Gary William Murning Online

Now, before I post this link, let me just preface it with a wee disclaimer.

1. I know this isn’t typical of Americans. Most are surprisingly normal, once you get to know them (although you, my friend, can be a bit of a nutter when you’ve had a few… or even when you haven’t ) So I’m not American-bashing.
2. Christians are people, too. And a large percentage of them are actually really great human beings who think Darwin rocks and don’t even believe in Hell anymore. So this isn’t a Christian-bashing piece.
3. Stupid people deserve respect. They are… oh, sorry, no, wait! Scratch that. This is a stupid-people-bashing piece!

So, to the article. This just cracked me up. Not only because it’s just so amazingly self-centred and disproportionate (sorry, people, God’s a bit preoccupied in China and Burma right now), but also because, well, it’s got a former beauty queen (I’m assuming that that means she’s ugly now) and someone called Rocky in it.

Oh, and if that doesn’t make you smile (I am, admittedly, easily pleased) how about this?

“These prices will come down, just like the walls of Jericho came down in the Bible.”

Does this mean he’s planning on sounding his horn?

“Use it while you’ve got it because it’ll go, it’s sliding away like water down a plughole.”

From this BBC piece.

Carrying on from here, few more of my favourite blogs…

1. Rambling On. Lottie and her very precise Virtual Bitchslaps (and more!).
2. Hayley’s Online Soapbox. A very refreshingly sceptical and investigative approach to the “paranormal.
3. Andrew’s Tech Blog. Newly discovered. A wealth of techie info from a very nice guy whose brains I want to pick
4. Richard Dawkins’s “In the News” Section. News stories with on science, atheism and religion.
5. Wired Science. Science blog network from Wired.
6. On the Road Again. My stand-up mate, John.

[Please be aware that not being included in the list does not necessarily mean your blog falls into the "badly written blogs that claim to speak with authority on subjects they quite clearly know nothing about" category.]

It’s always fascinating, even after in excess of ten years online, to discover the wonderful, distant places my rambling posts reach — places like, to name a few…

• Ulaanbaatar, Mongolia.
• Tacloban, Philippines.
• Abidjan, Cote d’Ivoire.
• Islamabad, Pakistan.
• Honolulu, Hawaii.
• Red Deer, Alberta, Canada.
• Fishkill, New York.
• Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia.

Oh, and let’s not forget…

• Exotic Cardiff in Welsh Wales.

I’ve been meaning to do this for a while, but what with my “creative endeavours” and whatnot, I just haven’t got round to it.

Until now.

The blogoshere is growing on a minute by minute basis. It’s estimated, in fact, to be growing so fast that by 2020 it will have broken free of its technological confines and turned the world and everything in it to a fish-paste-like mush… or was that nanobots? Either way, it’s a force to be reckoned with — and as our blogging skills increase I’m sure the trend for so-called “real journalists” to start sweating a bit and worrying about their job security will also continue to grow. Exponentially.

But, let’s face it, there’s a whole heap of dross out there. Silly, personal websites I have no objection to. They serve a purpose for the individual concerned and more power to them. What I don’t like, however, are the badly written blogs that claim to speak with authority on subjects they quite clearly know nothing about.

With this in mind, I thought I’d take a few moments to introduce you to some of my fellow bloggers who don’t fit into this category. These are the blogs I read on a daily basis. And they are a bit good.

See what you think.

1. The Odd Blog. Mike’s mix of Internutter de-masking and commentary.
2. PD Smith. Science writer par exellence.
3. The Will Rhodes Portmanteau. Will’s political blog.
4. Nectarville. Bekki’s blog. Slow down, girl!
5. Pharyngula. ”Evolution, development, and random biological ejaculations from a godless liberal.”
6. KurzweilAI.net. Science and futurism.

… that’s all for now, but more will follow soon.

[Edit: Please be aware that not being included in the list does not necessarily mean your blog falls into the "badly written blogs that claim to speak with authority on subjects they quite clearly know nothing about" category.]

Ah, yes, a day to “rise up singing”, as the song says. Endless blue sky, sunshine, the double Begonias looking pretty — and Bertrand Russell for company. What more can a bloke ask for?

Summer has indeed arrived and, because it may not be here for very long, I’ve been making the most of it — getting my 1,000 words written and then relaxing in the fresh air reading Religion and Science whilst listening to the kids out the back bounce enthusiastically on their trampoline (actually not as annoying as it might seem; the rest of our neighbours are either “getting on a bit” or just plain boring, so a couple of bouncing kids gives the place a bit of life.) I like this time of year. Not too hot, not too cold, the longer, brighter days making reading easier on the eyes.

It helps that Children of the Resolution is going well, of course. I know exactly where I am with it, what needs to be done and when it will be done by, so that when I allow myself a little relaxation time, I don’t find myself irritated by buzzing-fly problems in need of fixing. Turning off has always been difficult for me. I’m the type of writer (well, this applies to the non-writer in me, too) who will suddenly fall silent as an unsettling thought takes hold, and the only solution is for me to follow the thought to its inevitable conclusion. This can be time consuming, and not something I want happening when I’m trying to recharge. But planning this novel as methodically as I have has helped reduce these incidents to a bare minimum. I can therefore sit in peace with Bertrand, and talk to the Begonias.

Children of the Resolution is entering its darker phase, however, and I’m especially glad that the weather is such a glorious contrast to the inner landscape of my novel. I think it would be more of an emotional drain if I saw that darkness mirrored around me. Writing about the death of a friend in childhood… oddly, it’s not as difficult as one might expect. Writing is what I do. I’m involved, but (while I’m working on it, at least) it’s an involvement primarily with the project, with getting it right and being fair to the characters who inspired it. But still, it stirs a few memories: the cruelty of it all, the injustice, the “trench-humour”, the stupidity of some adults, the impossibility of — at times — saying the right thing and, perhaps most of all, the sense of a life unlived. No great insights. Not really. Just simple truths that, I suspect, are best contemplated in warm sunshine.

The real Johnny, I believe, wouldn’t have thought much of that, though. He would have sniffed his indifference and told me to put it away and finish it during the darkest days of December. “Mer-more atmosphere, that way,” he would have stammered. “Can’t ber-beat a ger-gloomy atmosphere to make you feel like you’re rer-really alive.”

And he’d probably have been right. In his own, unorthodox way, he usually was.

A fine post from Mike on the new Mayor of London.

It was suggested to me a while ago by friend and screenwriter Sean Hood that I write a blog post concerning my approach to writing characters who are very different to me — his example being an atheist writer having to tackle a character of faith. It was a fascinating suggestion, and I set about considering it deeply. So deeply, in fact, that two months have gone by and I still haven’t formulated a solid idea of how I approach this problem!

Writing, for me, is about making it personal, I suppose. When I “meet” or, even, “become” (I like the role-play feel of the first person) a new character, I immediately try to find something in them that I can relate to. Something significant that may not be quite so obvious to the reader. If I were writing the character of a Catholic priest, for example, I would probably look at the questions he asks himself during those long nights when sleep won’t come and see if, perhaps, they are similar to my own. I would look at the man (for, contrary to rumour, I am also a man ) and approach it from that angle, examining his back story to see how he arrived on his chosen path and also to see if, under different circumstances, I might have made different choices.

But this makes it all sound very methodical and thought-through, and it isn’t quite like that for me. This isn’t something that would be done “on paper”. I find my character and I live with him for a while, thinking about him, studying how he behaves and why in my head. If I can get to the “why”, I’m there. I don’t work at it from that point on, I just let him be who he is.

After twenty years of writing, it’s not something I really think about anymore — not in the usual sense of the word. It’s quite an… organic process, I suppose.

So, how do you approach writing a character with a very different perspective to your own?

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Well, I wouldn’t exactly say that I couldn’t live without them, but there are some good books in his list, so I will be checking out the ones I haven’t read.

Sebastian Faulks — the Forty Books He Can’t Live Without.

Ah, yes, a very special day for Old London Town. Dear Ken is ousted from the position of Mayor of London by the shaggy-haired Boris Johnson.

Now, I have mixed feelings about this. Don’t get me wrong, I have a huge soft spot for Boris. Firstly, it’s another poke in the eye  for Brown, whatever he might say to the contrary. Secondly, he has high entertainment value and thirdly… well, let’s face it, anyone who can piss off the whole of Liverpool in one fell swoop has to have something going for him. But if I lived in London, would I really want him as my mayor? Not really. A drink down the pub with him might be fun, but when his solution to congestion is to keep the traffic lights on green longer… no. I most certainly wouldn’t want him as my mayor.

A few Boris quotes:

“It is said that the Queen has come to love the Commonwealth, partly because it supplies her with regular cheering crowds of flag-waving piccaninnies.”

On a trip by Tony Blair to the Democratic Republic of Congo.  — “No doubt the AK47s will fall silent, the pangas will stop their hacking of human flesh, and the tribal warriors will all break out in watermelon smiles to see the big white chief touch down in his big white British taxpayer-funded bird.”

“If gay marriage was OK _ and I was uncertain on the issue _ then I saw no reason in principle why a union should not be consecrated between three men, as well as two men; or indeed three men and a dog.”

On President George W. Bush  — “That is the best case for Bush; that, among other things, he liberated Iraq. It is good enough for me.”

“If I was in charge I would get rid of Jamie Oliver and tell people to eat what they like.” [Gary: Okay, I take it back, I would want him as my mayor!]

“I think I was once given cocaine but I sneezed and so it did not go up my nose. In fact, I may have been doing icing sugar.”

“Labour’s appalling agenda, encouraging the teaching of homosexuality in schools, and all the rest of it.”

“I don’t see why people are so snooty about Channel 5. It has some respectable documentaries about the Second World War. It also devotes considerable airtime to investigations into lap dancing, and other related and vital subjects.”

“The dreadful truth is that when people come to see their MP, they have run out of better ideas.”

And my all-time favourite…

“Voting Tory will cause your wife to have bigger breasts and increase your chances of owning a BMW M3.”