14 comments on “Where the Buck Stops.

  1. I completely agree with you, Gary – but inbuilt into the first browsers were the ability to block certain sites – common knowledge.

    What this is all about is, utilising the child as a lever, is that governments want to control the internet, they are, in the west, slowing doing what they need to do to achieve that aim – not so in China etc – there they just did it.

    In the terms of use on social networking sites – is specifies that the people using it should not be younger than 13 – so what should happen to bring parents thoughts back toward actually doing something like monitoring this?

    Simple, easy-peeasy!

    Sue the parents that allowed the child to do what they have done! Better still – sue the frigging kid! That will focus them for the next 20 years as they are trying to pay off the lawyers bills and the compensation awarded.

    The T&C is a contract FFS! “By clicking here you…agree” etc.

    Not frigging hard is it?

  2. What this is all about is, utilising the child as a lever, is that governments want to control the internet, they are, in the west, slowing doing what they need to do to achieve that aim – not so in China etc – there they just did it.

    I think you might have a point, here. It certainly wouldn’t surprise me.

    The T&C is a contract FFS! “By clicking here you…agree” etc.

    Again, an excellent point and one, as I may have said before, that so few people get.

  3. Pingback: Think of the Children! « The Will Rhodes Portmanteau

  4. I couldn’t agree with you more, Gary. It’s absolutely the parents’ responsibility.

    Mike and I carefully monitor what our son does online. Some sites, he’s simply not allowed to access at all. If we find out he’s been to any of them, he’ll lose his computer for a specified period (haven’t had to deal with it yet).

    He has a YouTube channel and all the new friend invitations, message/comment notifications and new subscriber notices come through my email account. I look at every single one of them, watch their videos, etc. and go from there. I’ve only had to refuse one invitation, but doing so made me glad I was keeping such a close eye on things.

    We also have rules. One is that there is to be no private messaging; all communication is to take place out in the open. We’re willing to reevaluate this as he gets older, but that’s the way it is for right now.

    So, yeah, I totally agree. Parents who are too busy to parent need to examine their priorities. Sorry if that sounds harsh, but it’s honestly I how I feel.

  5. Oh I nearly forgot:

    Identity firm Garlik found that a quarter of the parents surveyed said they secretly log into their child’s networking page, to check they aren’t befriending strangers.

    I take issue with doing it secretly because it undermines trust which is vital to the parent/child relationship. We do it right out in the open. He knows we’re monitoring what he does. We want him to know. An ounce of prevention…

    It might sound weird, but I think he actually appreciates it. If he happens to see an invitation before I do, he’ll call me into his room to check it out before he accepts.

  6. Sue the parents that allowed the child to do what they have done! Better still – sue the frigging kid!

    I don’t think I would go that far. Like I said, I allow my son to use a YouTube account that is registered to me (he’s not old enough to have his own). He likes to watch music videos, videos about Nerf guns, instructional dance videos and stuff like that. I don’t think I should be sued for that. I think it should be my choice as a parent.

    However, I realize that with that choice comes extra responsibility, and I take that very seriously. So, while I don’t believe I should be sued for allowing my son to access YouTube, I certainly wouldn’t try to sue YouTube if something went wrong as a result of his doing so.

    By the way, I overheard one of his friends telling him to enter a fake date of birth to access sites with age restrictions. I tore into him for telling my son to lie and teaching him to cheat. I explained that sites with age restrictions have them for a reason and if I ever found out that he (my son) had done that, he would lose his computer indefinitely. He now asks permission before registering with any site, even the ones without age restrictions.

  7. Unarguably solid opinion you got there, mate!I’m in.
    As far as I reckon based on a quarter of century life here as a mortal, the only right parents have upon their children is when they wish for ones –coitus to create another life. As for the rest, it only consists of obligations upon their kids — constant nurture, including protections of course.

    And speaking about devices to access internet, I use mobile almost all the time. But one thing is worth noting here, I am an ADULT. Well, at least in term of age. LOL.

  8. Lottie: sounds to me as if you’ve got it about right; sensible, reasonable behaviour sets the example for the child — and in your case, it is clearly working. Sensible, reasonable behaviour all round 😉

    As long as you let him access my site! LOL

    Baba: I think you have a good point there, my friend. Parents make the choice to have the child (even when it’s an “accidents”), and the responsibility that that carries with it should indeed remain for a lifetime, to a degree, at least. Sadly, not all parents see it that way.

    You’re about as much of an adult that I am, mate. And I’m forty one going on five! 😉

  9. Actually, he does look at your site occasionally. Did I mention that he writes some too?

    He also refers to you by your full name. It’s kind of funny because when he says it, it actually sounds like one long name: GaryWilliamMurning. lol

  10. No, Lottie, I didn’t know that he writes, too. A talented young man, quite clearly 🙂

    GaryWilliamMurning — I like that LOL. But tell him from me, as one writer to another, he’s more than welcome to just call me Gary. 😉

  11. His teachers have always remarked on his reading and writing skills. He’s received a couple of ribbons for things he’s written, and always gets high marks.

    I’d say I hate to brag, but I’d be lying, obviously. LOL

    I’ll give him your message. 😉

  12. Kudos to you for making this point. If one chooses to have a child (and yes, it’s always a choice, regardless of conflicting opinions), then one chooses to be a parent. And a parent, by definition, means parenting, not pawning off one’s children onto someone/thing else. I don’t buy the argument of busy parents: prioritize for heaven’s sakes.

    It also strikes me that — as a society — we constantly undermine personal responsibility and natural consequences. When are we going to realize that we’re destroying ourselves?

  13. Lottie: damn, just what I need — more competition! 😉

    Alex: thanks for commenting. You make an excellent point regarding personal responsibility and natural consequences. As a society, yes, we are at times far too quick to “blame” someone else — in this case, MySpace, Facebook et al.

  14. Pingback: A Week Is a Long Time. « Gary William Murning Online

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