Looking Back…
August 23, 2008
It seems I’m pulling in quite a few new readers at the moment. My daily page hit count has been around 184 over the past week or so, jumping up to 233 on one occasion. Not exactly in the same league as some out there, but a definite improvement and rather gratifying nonetheless.
So, I’d just like to take this opportunity to thank you all for helping my blog to grow. Your comments are always welcome (in fact, if you’re a new reader, please feel free to treat this as an opportunity to say hello — pimp your own blog, even, if you wish!)
Because so many new people are dropping by I thought it might be fun to look back at some of my earlier articles. I’ve picked five of my personal favourites. If you’re a regular reader and there’s an older article of mine that you like which I haven’t mentioned, please feel free to shout up!
Five of the Best.
- Drawing the Line. February 25, 2008. I like this piece because it gives an insight into how I write and, in particular, how I wrote Children of the Resolution. It was good for me to read it again. Especially at this “between-projects” time.
- Disability in Fiction. February 16, 2008. Another writing-related piece concerning expectation in writing.
- The Pleasure of Finding Things Out. November 26, 2007. The Richard Feynman Horizon interview — with a short introduction by me.
- You Can’t Say That. June 23, 2008. A rant on our ridiculous fear of causing offence. In part a tribute to the late George Carlin.
- Elvis, Marty Lacker… and Me. August 3, 2008. This is one of my all-time favourites because it provided me, quite unexpectedly, with the opportunity to exchange emails with one of Elvis Presley’s closest friends, Memphis Mafia member Marty Lacker. I may have a further update on this story in the not too distant future.
Well, I think that’s all for now. Take a look when you have time and enjoy. These five post probably epitomise pretty well just what I am about — or what my blog is about, at least!
Saving the Planet.
June 24, 2008
One more George video…
Once again he perfectly sums up my feelings on this subject. Wonderful, you old, dead motherfucker!
You Can’t Say That.
June 23, 2008
I’ve been thinking about the death of George Carlin for the past few minutes — specifically his Seven Words You Can Never Say on TV routine, which can be seen in my previous post.
In 1972, Carlin was arrested in Milwaukee for disturbing the peace after performing this act and, even though I don’t know a great deal about the man (I only recently discovered him; he wasn’t that well known in my neck of the woods), it seems obvious that even then he could very clearly see the road down which we were travelling — the road to that place where the greatest sin of all is to cause offence.
Personally, I’ve never really been someone to deliberately go out of my way to offend. Except in exceptional circumstances. But increasingly I find myself appalled by the cultural mass-mindset I see around me. Everyone is perpetually afraid, it seems, to offend. Words that were once acceptable now no longer are, everyone is a minority in need of protecting, of cosseting, of being kept happy and free from unnecessary stress. You can’t say that, but you can say this — unless such and such a person is present, then it might be construed to mean something quite different, in which case, say this instead, making sure that you smile at the same time so that it can’t be misinterpreted as unnecessarily sarcastic or ironic. Whether you’re gay, black, Asian, disabled — or just a plain old vanilla Caucasian with everything in working order — you can guarantee that at some time someone will perform a nifty little verbal Riverdance routine in order to avoid causing offence. And, without wishing to offend (!), it is a complete load of fucking bollocks.
Now I’m fairly sure there’s someone out there with an “ah, but” at the ready. And quite rightly so. There is a line that cannot be crossed — a line that isn’t about the choice of words but about intent. Offending people, I will state quite clearly, is not always a bad thing. Quite often, in fact, it’s to be applauded. But this doesn’t mean that by saying this we are sanctioning bigotry and hatred. Quite the opposite, in fact.
You see, any liberties and rights that we might have (and I’d recommend hearing what George has to say about these things!) are for me founded on one basic principle; my right to have and express an opinion. Yes, with this comes responsibility. If I say something unacceptable (for example, something intended to incite racial hatred) then I should be held accountable. But for mere offence? Should I be gagged simply because I make someone feel uncomfortable, or make them question the number of burgers they eat in an average week? I don’t think so.
You see, I can say that. People like George help us see that. I can say that and, more to the point, so can you.
And if they don’t like it… well, fuck ‘em.
George Carlin, RIP.
June 23, 2008
Cult comedian, George Carlin aged 71, has died in California of heart failure.
Warning: this clip contains material that some may find offensive.
(Please Don’t) Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go.
June 12, 2008
Privacy. Something we all naturally like to protect, especially in this day and age. The smart people hold something back and are understandably outraged when someone does something that undermines this.
So I occasionally find myself sympathising with certain celebrities. Not often, admittedly, but just occasionally, when the press pushes it just a little bit too far, I shake my head and think, “Not good. Someone should put a stop to that.”
When it comes to George Michael, however, I have absolutely no sympathy at all. I don’t think I can actually say what I think about him, for fear of legal repercussions (and I’m not being paranoid; the people I write about here do occasionally read my blog — more about that at a later date.) But let it suffice to say that I’m not a fan of the man or his music.
Now, before anyone accuses me of being homophobic — don’t. It’s a cheap shot and you’ll have to do better than that. My dislike is founded in his ridiculous courting of publicity he then claims he wishes to avoid. The episode in the toilet and his jolly boy’s outing on Hampstead Heath don’t even come into it, nor does his use of cannabis. Frankly, I don’t care. It’s probably worth mentioning, however, that if he thinks this is the way to avoid publicity then… well, I’ll simply say that I can’t see his application for Mensa being accepted any time soon.
And so, he’s giving up touring and seeking “a quieter life”. And, in pursuit of said quieter life, he naturally gave an interview to the BBC! He also said similar things about not wanting to be in the public eye quite so much on Parkinson a while ago…
… and I can’t help wondering just how many other interviews he’s given on this subject!
George, George, George… buy yourself a nice chateaux somewhere remote, keep out of trouble for a few months, don’t give interviews, have a proper shave — and rest assured, piece by piece, a little at a time, the quiet life will find you.
If you want it to, that is.
Mayor Boris.
May 3, 2008
Ah, yes, a very special day for Old London Town. Dear Ken is ousted from the position of Mayor of London by the shaggy-haired Boris Johnson.
Now, I have mixed feelings about this. Don’t get me wrong, I have a huge soft spot for Boris. Firstly, it’s another poke in the eye for Brown, whatever he might say to the contrary. Secondly, he has high entertainment value and thirdly… well, let’s face it, anyone who can piss off the whole of Liverpool in one fell swoop has to have something going for him. But if I lived in London, would I really want him as my mayor? Not really. A drink down the pub with him might be fun, but when his solution to congestion is to keep the traffic lights on green longer… no. I most certainly wouldn’t want him as my mayor.
A few Boris quotes:
“It is said that the Queen has come to love the Commonwealth, partly because it supplies her with regular cheering crowds of flag-waving piccaninnies.”
On a trip by Tony Blair to the Democratic Republic of Congo. — “No doubt the AK47s will fall silent, the pangas will stop their hacking of human flesh, and the tribal warriors will all break out in watermelon smiles to see the big white chief touch down in his big white British taxpayer-funded bird.”
“If gay marriage was OK _ and I was uncertain on the issue _ then I saw no reason in principle why a union should not be consecrated between three men, as well as two men; or indeed three men and a dog.”
On President George W. Bush — “That is the best case for Bush; that, among other things, he liberated Iraq. It is good enough for me.”
“If I was in charge I would get rid of Jamie Oliver and tell people to eat what they like.” [Gary: Okay, I take it back, I would want him as my mayor!]
“I think I was once given cocaine but I sneezed and so it did not go up my nose. In fact, I may have been doing icing sugar.”
“Labour’s appalling agenda, encouraging the teaching of homosexuality in schools, and all the rest of it.”
“I don’t see why people are so snooty about Channel 5. It has some respectable documentaries about the Second World War. It also devotes considerable airtime to investigations into lap dancing, and other related and vital subjects.”
“The dreadful truth is that when people come to see their MP, they have run out of better ideas.”
And my all-time favourite…
“Voting Tory will cause your wife to have bigger breasts and increase your chances of owning a BMW M3.”
Let’s Call a Crip a Crip…
March 20, 2008
More delights from the wit that is George Carlin — this time on “soft language.”
George Who?
March 3, 2008
I was going to write a “proper” post today but — what with having tech issues (which delayed the start of my writing day) — I’m afraid I’ve had neither the time nor the inspiration.
So I’m going to share this new discovery with you, instead. New to me, at least. A genuinely clever and funny comedian called George Carlin.
WARNING: Contains stong language.
